This is part two of the “Waiting for the spanking” post.
Oh, how funny life is, or sad depending on how you look at it.
A day after I wrote the “Waiting” post I fell back into a major sin. What is it you ask? Don’t think for a second I’m going to write it here.
My point is that a day after I write the post, talking about knowing what is wrong, and then doing what is wrong, and knowing it is wrong while I’m doing it… I do it.
However, the night it happened I dropped down to my knees in front of my bed and prayed a serious prayer of forgiveness. Did I feel bad for what I did. Yep. Did I feel a little worse because of what I just wrote about 24 hours earlier… yes sirie.
I guess what I took from the situation was that I wasn’t waiting for the spanking, or some horrible thing to pay me back because of what I did. The crazy thing is that the next day, something very disappointing did happen, and my mind didn’t even go near the “See! This is what you deserve!” kinda attitude.
I did wrong, know I did wrong, asked for forgiveness with a genuine heart and moved on with a plan to do better the next time.
I think that is what God wants from us. I think that is what He is waiting for.
He wants us to acknowledge what we did wrong, and put things in place to not go down the same path the next time, all that is understandable. But do you know what I think God liked… actually loved the most? It was that night, when I felt totally broken, totally exhausted from my sinful actions and warped line of thinking… When I dragged my body into my bedroom, dropped down to my knees and prayed.
I didn’t see Him as the cop in the sky, or mighty Zeus figure aiming His lightning bolts at me. I felt a loving Father so close to me, as if His arms were wrapping around me holding together my weak and worn out body, and so happy because He got what He was waiting for… and so did I.
What is God waiting for you to do?