SUMMING THINGS UP… WITH TEAMING UP: FAST FOOD, INTERNET PORN AND CREDIT CARDS A YOUNG MAN’S THREE PITFALLS

by admin on November 8, 2012

I’m betting that if I take the average male teenager or early 20 year old, they will already be wrestling with one of these… if not more than one. Are there are things we should be teaching our young men (and women) to stay away from? Absolutely, and I’ll save those for another post. However, start with these three. Take inventory on how your are doing, or how your child reacts when you talk about these topics. Explain tough times you’ve had with certain temptations, and how you can team up for better results. As men we feel more “manly” to take things on by ourselves, whether it is a home improvement project, or being the one who can make the winning sports play. “I can handle it”, is a mantra we need to get away from… especially when dealing with challenging issues.

Temptation flourishes when we are alone and isolated. When we have no one to turn to, and talk about our feelings and downfalls, we think we are the only freak who is dealing with these issues. The bottom-line is look at the amount of overweight people in the world who wrestle with eating too much junk. Realize that the amount of teenage boys in America who have not been exposed to any internet porn is nearing zero. Reread what I wrote about the average credit card balance for most people.

You are not alone.

Instead we pull back, keep silent and keep up the serade that we are near perfect. I’ve done it many times before myself. As a result, we find our culture completely unhealthy and are paying for it dearly through high medical costs. By expecting our girlfriends and wives to look and act like porn stars, and fail to gain real intimacy, and wonder why less people are getting married, and when they do, they are around a 50% divorce rate. Overspending and unnecessary credit card debt keeps us from focusing on what is truly important in life, and helps our culture reach the jaw dropping stat of by age 65, 90-95% of Americans are either dead or dead broke where we have to depend on others.

If you feel I’ve over exaggerated some of these points, I can understand. However, it is my viewpoint that because we have not paid enough attention to them, is the reason why we are having many epidemics in these areas. Regular fast food becomes “normal”, and hence does the “normal” overweight standard we now have in America. Men watching porn on the web is now “normal”, and it is now normal to have everything from one night stands to affairs. Carrying a balance which takes years to pay off is “normal”, and so is the practice of living beyond our means and having little to no savings for emergencies or for the future.

To help ourselves get past these normalcies, I would advise all of us (because once again, I’m far from perfect) to go through these steps with these three topics – or any others you think are important:

1. Be aware of your thoughts and behaviors. If you don’t see or admit any pitfalls, it is difficult to step over them and even harder to get out once you’ve fallen in deep.

2. Get help. Against popular belief, men do not know it all. Worse, we think we do. We need to seek out knowledge of the best strategies on how to deal with our issues.

3. Engage in a community. Find others who are struggling as well, and those who can come around you for support, whether it is an exercise/diet group, online porn addiction forum or financial planner who is practical about budgeting.

4. Pray. God already knows your struggles whether you believe in Him or not. He knows your mistakes. He understands your trials. He gets your pain. He has not forgotten you, and has never-ever turned His back on you. He IS waiting for you to talk to Him right now about how YOU feel, what YOUR problem is, and what you need to overcome it.

Many of us have struggles outside of these three areas, and some of us are parents who have sons who are caught in a detrimental rut. You can apply the above steps to whatever your hang up is, and opening up a conversation with your child about these and other topics is the BEST thing you can do. Don’t isolate your kids unintentionally by thinking that if you don’t talk about it, it doesn’t or won’t exist. Here is a clue, fast food places spend billions on trying to get your sons hooked on their food. I guarantee at least one of their friends have tried showing them pornographic material by age 10, or have told them how to access it through their smart phones and search engines. Credit card companies are making it easier than ever to “save” something, or get something as long as they fill out this little application for immediate unqualified credit.

If you have a problem with any of these issues, start with the four step plan above… or even feel free to contact me directly.

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